| Poem - 'Emptiness' |
Sad, so sad
Pain that never goes away
People tell me that time helps
I want to believe them
I have to believe them
For I don’t want to go on feeling like this
I am simply existing
I want to live again
A wonderful caring husband
two treasured sons
a beautiful, adored grand daughter
I love and need them all
Good health
a comfortable house
a good job
I am lucky
Yet nothing fills the aching emptiness
that Kathy’s death has left for me
And nothing erases the constant thoughts of her
that dominate my every waking moment
For a time it seemed to be improving.
It was only the easing of the immediate numbing grief
The shock, the horror lessened
Now is the reality of life without my beautiful daughter
I miss her so much
How can it be possible?
The child I carried in my womb
gave birth to
lived with
and loved for twenty eight years
is no longer here
She has been gone long enough
This horrible nightmare will soon end
Then reality strikes again
I will never see her
hear her
talk, laugh and cry with her
nor hold her in my arms again
And I am sad, so sad.
29/4/98
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